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There are two outcomes to this and all I can say for either is, “Bye, hope to see you soon.” But we both know, you don’t want anything to do with me in neither scenario.

Beethoven: ARE YOU READY TO HEAR SOME SYMPHONIES?!

Audience: *cheers*

Beethoven: I CAN'T HEAR YOU!!

breakfastburritoe:

depressed-0bsessed:

breakfastburritoe:

Are you a fisherman because I think you’re a reel catch

You spelled real wrong.

Throw this one back into the water boys we’ve got ourselves a city slicker

(via xgracieloux)

Me: *Walks into hotel room*

Japanese Diplomat: Hello, my name is Khairoji. I am from Japan, but I am Indonesian. My English not good.

Me: Konichiwa, my name is Damiyr. My Japanese is not good. But, I am from the States. You are Indonesian?

Khairoji: Yes.

Me: Are you Muslim?

Khairoji: Yes..

Me: Me too!

Khairoji: *surprised smile*

Both of us at same time: Asalaamu Alaikum!

Khairoji: *Points to his skin, and then my skin, and shakes his head*

Khairoji: *Points to His heart, and then my heart* and says:

Khairoji: Brothers.

nailerforge:

ITS 3 IN GHE MORNING IM CRYING

(via the-roots-around-her-ribcage)

omfgsid:

My 4 year old brother told me he was scared to grow up and cried for like 10 minutes straight

finally I asked why he was so scared

and he said he was scared of drinking coffee

coffee

(via the-roots-around-her-ribcage)

regalasfuck:

i-came-from-the-brotherhood:

singing-hope:

wild-guy:

Courage the Cowardly Dog: Last of the Starmakers

This episode made me cry unmanly tears

^^^

yoo shit was really wild

(via ruinedchildhood)

robelessd:

Hocus Pocus (1993)

it’s almost that time of the year again!!!

(via nardoretardo)

algebratwo:

The asymptote of Nicki Minaj’s booty on the Anaconda cover is y = -20x

(via ruinedchildhood)